How Do We Become Our Best Self?

Everyone wants to — or should want to — get better. A common expression implores us to “be your best self” but how exactly does one do that?

The end of the calendar year often leads to some reflection on the past, and perhaps even to some self evaluation. In turn, this might lead to new year’s resolutions, or things you may want to change or improve about yourself.

But is change even possible? Sometimes it feels like year after year you have the desire to change, but may not have the capacity to carry through on that desire. Is it just a matter of not having the willpower, or is there something deeper at work here?


Listen to a podcast where Michael and Lee discuss the related question: ‘What do you believe?’ We also discuss a bonus question: ‘What are you willing to sacrifice?’


For example, some people, after thinking about their life, may decide they resolve to be a more positive — or at least a less negative — person in the new year. But some studies seem to indicate that a person’s happiness level is pretty constant. While it might change a bit in the short term, long-term happiness remains mostly constant.

After all, we live in an age of wonder, where we know more and can do more and live longer than at any time in history. And yet, there is no evidence that we are any happier — in fact, the opposite maybe true.

But of course, some change is possible. No one stays the same — at the very least, a person will get older, which is one kind of change. But can we direct that change and make meaningful strides in our desire to improve? And if so, how? How do we become our best selves?

Related questions: What are you doing to improve yourself? How does creative expression help us to know ourselves better? Is life today better than in the past? What are you doing to make the world a better place?