Imagine, for a moment, that there was another person who was exactly like you. They have the same physical characteristics and the same personality. Do you think you would be friends with that person?
As an individual, you possess many traits. Sometimes, these traits are synchronous with other traits you also possess. Other times, they may come into conflict.
For example, let’s say you like movies. If there was another you, both of you would enjoy movies, and even the same movies. The thing you like — movies — makes you compatible.
On the other hand, let’s imagine you have an alpha personality. You might be the natural dominant personality in any situation. However, a second you would also want to be the dominant one, which puts you in conflict with yourself.
In everyday life, sometimes people find themselves attracted to opposites. They like being around people with different backgrounds, or who have different skill sets. Others might like people who look and act just like them.
Which one are you? Do you surround yourself with similar people? Do you think you have a personality that is compatible with itself? Or would some of your traits or behaviors be irksome if they happened in someone else?
Would you be friends with yourself?
Related questions: Why do we like what we like? What makes a friendship? What qualities do you look for in a friend? How do you cheer yourself up?
I want to be surrounded by people who care snd show respect for one another, who are intellectually curious, adventurous, and fun.
Do I fit the bill? Would I be friends with myself?
I am an introspective person. I am already constantly (silently) talking with myself about health — physical, mental, intellectual, and spiritual — as well as politics, ending homelessness and poverty, addressing climate change, promoting real food, gardening, and oh so many other things. For the most part, I enjoy or feel challenged by these already personal conversations. And I would love gentle prodding of someone like me, but with a slightly different (outside myself) perspective.
In my best moments, I am a cheerleader, urging people to be their best selves and celebrating their accomplishments. I enjoy this aspect of myself. I think I would do a great job of fostering this in conversations with the second me.
On the other hand, I am also a person who can spiral downward into the depths of my twin mental illnesses of Anxiety and Depression. If I were physically another version of me, would I be helpful? Or would I join in on the high level of self-criticism that I already frequently engage in? I would hope that the other version of myself would have the perspective to gently nudge me into a place of better, stronger health.
Adventurous? Hmmm. I think my two selves would escape into my introversion and just love conversations. I’m not sure my other self would encourage me to take that second dive outside an airplane, train for another marathon, or get myself practicing yoga again. I’d hope so. But again, I think the two of us would just like testing one another intellectually.
Would I be friends with myself? Sure. But I think I’d leave the adventurous side to my interactions with other people.