When someone holds two conflicting ideas in mind at once, do you think it is likely to be intentional hypocrisy? Or are they simply a victim of cognitive dissonance? How does this apply to you?
Share why if you wish.
Category: Discomfort
What Is Too Much To Accept?
Sometimes, events reach a breaking point when you simply cannot stand what is happening. What is too much to accept?
For some people, change is uncomfortable. As a result, there are many people who like the status quo. They prefer things stay the way they currently are.
Of course, the world is constantly in flux. Things change all the time. However, in order to preserve the status quo, you must be able to deal with that change.
As a result, there are people who can ignore, minimize, or otherwise accept the new conditions. Often, the introduced changes are small in nature, which makes it relatively easy to adapt to them.
These small changes, though, add up over time. Eventually, the sum total becomes cumulatively so large that these techniques used to adapt start to break down. The new situation is too much to deal with.
For example, let’s imagine you have a job. You like most things about the job — the hours, the coworkers, the commute, the pay. There might be a few things that frustrate you, but you can deal with them.
Over time, though, things change. You don’t get a raise due to company cutbacks. Your closest friends leave for other jobs. You get a new boss who expects you to put in more hours. The office relocates even further away.
You can deal with any one of these things. But over time, they add up. At some point, it gets to b too much, and you decide to start looking for a different job.
How do you make that decision? When will you know that you are no longer able to justify what is happening, and you need the status quo to change. And what lengths will you go to in order to make that happen?
Related questions: What is necessary to change your mind? When have you had a sudden change of viewpoint? What makes change possible? How do you set priorities?
When Is Confrontation Preferable?
Confrontation can be awkward for some. In some cases, however, it just might be the preferable course of action. But which cases?
Some people are just naturally non-confrontational. Perhaps it is how they were raised, or maybe it’s just a personality trait. Whatever the reason, there is some subset of the populace that doesn’t feel comfortable confronting others. Even if they deserve it.
At the other end of the spectrum, there are aggressive people for whom confrontation is not an issue. As a default, they might challenge just about anyone they meet, for the slightest — or even no — reason.
Chances are, you lie somewhere between these two extremes. And yet, the issue of deciding when to challenge and when to defer is one that each one of us — no matter where we fall on the confrontation spectrum — faces regularly.
So how can we decide? Which circumstances are right for getting in someone’s face, even if it is uncomfortable to do so? When is it better to back down? And how might you overcome your natural inclination when you decide you should, whether it be to be more or less confrontational than is natural?
Related questions: Avoidance or confrontation? How do you stand up to a bully? How can we build confidence? What gives a person value?
What The Hell?
What the hell?
It feels like our country has shifted into the bizarro world. Whether it’s rules, social norms, or politics, what was once accepted is now rejected, and what was previously dismissed is now embraced. Ideas we believed a generation, a decade, or even a year ago now seem outdated or have been completely overturned. What the hell?
For example, overt lying is now common in politics, and most of the public accepts it. In fact, spreading lies is widespread. However, not long ago, when those lies were exposed, a politician’s approval ratings would drop—unless, of course, they soon showed genuine remorse.
Or, whatever happened to treating people with respect, kindness, and a little grace? We live in an era where friendships are ending because everything has become political, and disagreements turn into hatred. Family members don’t talk to each other or even disown one another over political differences. And some politicians label their opponents as evil or even compare them to subhuman creatures — for example, our president often calls opponents animals or vermin. When and why have we let so much harshness into our private and public lives?
Lastly, social media isn’t bringing us together, even though we can connect with people across the globe. Instead, our feeds are filled with rumors, lies, and bullying, which turn people away from forming new relationships—unless, of course, the people we meet share our beliefs.
We’re confused, angry, overwhelmed — and worst of all, numb. When everything feels upside down, it’s hard to know where to turn or whom to trust. So many have checked out, opting for apathy instead of action, because what good does caring do anymore? Every day brings a new contradiction, a new reason to shout, yet we stay silent. Or worse, we laugh it off. Cynicism has replaced hope. We’ve started accepting the absurd as normal because fighting it seems pointless. But shouldn’t we fight? Shouldn’t we care? Shouldn’t we be trying to find ways to rebuild community?
What’s going on? What the hell?
Related questions: Why do we put up with unhappiness? What is truth? Where is society failing? How do you deal with uncertainty?
When Was The Last Time You Said ‘I Don’t Know’?
Admitting that you don’t know something can be embarrassing. As a result, many people pretend they know something even when they don’t. When was the last time you said ‘I don’t know’?
Share why if you wish.