Category: Empathy

How Do You Deal With Disappointment?

Disappointment is something that we all have in common. The way we deal with it, though, can vary drastically.

When something disappoints you, it is only natural to be sad. You expected one outcome, and it didn’t happen. How else should you feel?

It depends on the situation, of course. Another common emotion that you might feel is anger. You might be mad at the universe, or at someone specific, or even at yourself. Who feels the brunt of your anger is difficult to predict.

You might also feel confused, depending on your level of certainty prior to the disappointment. How could such a thing happen?

One thing these emotions have in common is that they are negative emotions. It is rare indeed that being disappointed leads to happiness, or contentment, or joy of any kind.

The resulting actions, though, can be positive or negative. Sadness might lead to depression, or it might lead to empathy for others dealing with similar situations. A violent outburst might result from anger, but it might strengthen your resolve. Confusion could cause you to give up; alternately confusion could trigger curiosity.

How do you deal with disappointment? Has that changed over the years? How is it different when you are the one experiencing it, versus helping someone else who has been disappointed?

Related questions: How can we turn sadness into constructive action? What is the right amount of emotion? When is it useful to fail?

 

How Do You Support Others?

Helping to support people in need is one of the most fundamental of human traits. How might you go about it?

Supporting others is something we are called upon to do at various times in our lives.

From a strictly transactional point of view, it makes sense to do this. After all, there will no doubt be times in your own life when you will need to rely on others. To make sure that help is there when you need it, it makes sense to provide your own support when you are able.

It’s also true that helping others simply feels good. Even when it might be difficult or cause some hardship for you, the happiness or relief that you might bring to someone going through a difficult time can be worth it.

Moreover, you probably want the best for your friends and loved ones. You want to ease their struggle, if you can. Not because you expect something in return, but you want someone you love to have a better life.

So assisting in providing a framework to assist people makes sense. How might you do that?

It might be difficult to provide a simple answer. After all, the ways in which people need support can vary almost infinitely. It might be difficult to list all possibilities.

One way to help is to imagine you were in their shoes. What kind of support would you need in that situation? Is that something you can do, or you can mobilize others to do? You might also ask what help is needed, if you’re unsure.

Can you think of other ways? Are you attuned to who in your orbit needs your support?

Related questions: How can you help? When have you asked for help? What are our responsibilities to others?

How Do You Deal With Suffering?

Regardless of your lot in life, you will have to deal with suffering at some point, either your own or someone else’s. How will you handle it?

There are many different ways to go through difficult times. “Suffering” can be defined in many different ways.

One common type is to go through an emotional grieving process at the loss of a family member or other loved one. Because everyone dies eventually, we will all need to handle grief and the wave of emotions that can come with it several times over throughout the course of an average lifespan.

Similarly, the longer you live, the more likely you will have some sort of health problem. These can run the gamut from minor but intense to long-term, chronic issues.

There is yet another wrinkle thrown in when you have to deal not with your own, but the suffering of someone close to you. Even if you don’t experience the pain directly, either physical or emotional, watching a loved one go through it and being unable to do anything to ease that pain can be very difficult.

So how do you deal with it? Chances are, you have had the experience a number of times already, and will have many more in the future. So how did you handle it in the past, and how will you approach future events? Do you keep things bottled up, or share with others? Are you more likely to experience anger, grim resignation, or black humor? How do you deal with suffering?

Related questions: What is the worst pain you’ve ever experienced? What is the right amount of emotion? How do you deal with loss? What can you learn from loss? What are our responsibilities to others?

What Does Your Pet Think Of You?

We know so little about our own consciousness, let alone that of animals. Which leads to the question: what does your pet think of you?

Animals in general, and pets in particular, clearly have some level of thought. They can learn some basic tricks, and many of them respond to their name. They exhibit feelings, at times being happy, or sad, or angry.

Some pets have even learned a rudimentary way of talking. By programming a number of buttons that say a particular word when pressed, the owner of a dog or a cat can teach the pet to press a button to “say” words like “food”, “walk”, “play”, and many others.

Of course, this may be a combination of rewards training, randomness, and anthropomorphizing. It is difficult to say for certain, since we don’t really know what pets think or feel.

Still, humans that have pets can discern patterns in behavior. A cat owner may notice the cat being able to tell when dinner time is approaching. Or a dog might associate the picking up of a leash with going out for a walk.

It is fun to speculate how exactly our pets see us. Do they see us as just an odd-looking member of their species? Is the owner seen as a parent, or are they seen as a juvenile who needs protection and feeding? (People who keep cats, for example, may be familiar with being “gifted” with a dead mouse or bird.) Or perhaps they understand the concept of different species?

If you have a pet, or know someone who does, have you ever wondered what goes on in the mind of that pet? What do they think of us?

Related questions: What is your relationship with your pet? How does your pet bring you joy? Is your pet part of your family? Cats or dogs?

What Are Your First World Problems?

What are your first world problems — that is, problems that only arise due to success or opportunity. For example, your groceries not being able to fit in your refrigerator.

They are problems, of course, although it is useful to put them into context.

Share why if you wish.